Could you stay with Life in the UK?

As I mentioned in my last post, it's been nearly 5 years since we moved to the U.K. This means that we are now eligible for permanent residency. To get this, you need to pay a big heap of money (like a couple of thousand pounds) and you need to pass a 24 question test entitled, "Life in the UK". This is a variety of questions about Britain's history, demographics, holidays, politics and etc. It's only 24 questions, but there's about 200 questions you could be asked. We actually had to study to pass this, it wasn't simple. But neither was it particularly relevant or useful. Why do I need to know the biggest immigrant groups to the UK during the 50s, 60s, 70s and 80s?

Most information I needed to know for the Life in the UK test will not be very useful for anything but the odd pub quiz, but some information would have been useful if they had provided it when we moved here. Then I could have known how things worked straightaway rather than spending five years figuring it out for myself! Five years on, they bother to tell me in the study material how council taxes work. Trust me, the council found us and made sure we understood (i.e. paid) long before this!! One would think they would equip new immigrants to the UK far better for integration by giving them all this information at the start of their move to the country, rather than after several years of establishment. Talk about missing the boat - weak immigration pun intended.

So if you are a British citizen and want to see if you truly deserve citizenship, try taking this little test here. Life in the UK Sample Test. Good luck with that. Let me know if I should call round to take back your passport tomorrow.

Red Tape at its Finest - The DVLA

I'm feeling a lot of anger towards the DVLA today. DVLA stands for Driver and Vehicle Licensing Agency. They are the people who issue UK driver licenses. And they are useless.

I'm finally changing my Canadian license to a UK one. This should have been done a few years ago according to my insurance and they are a bit ticked off it wasn't done before. Ticked off enough to strike me off our car insurance policy until it's changed. So no driving for me until this is all done.

Okay, no big deal, just send in all my paperwork and my Canadian license and my passport. Within 15 working days, I should get my new license back. Of course, there will be the problem that the DVLA say that Canadian licenses don't specify if I can drive a manual transmission, so it will likely say that I'm only allowed to drive an automatic. Never mind the fact that Albertan licenses DO in fact have a classification for people who can only drive an automatic on them, that doesn't count according to the DVLA. I don't know what they want - to have sat with me when I did my test in a tiny manual hatchback that wintery afternoon of 1987? Of course neither of our cars is automatic, just like 84% of the cars on the road in the UK.

So I go and spend loads of money on sending all the documents special delivery and also enclose another prepaid special delivery envelope to get my passport back in (as they send that before the license is ready). This week there was a special delivery for me but I wasn't in to get it. I figured it was my passport but it had to wait until G was back from his business trip so he could chauffeur me over to the main post office in Maidenhead to pick it up.

I went to pick it up today and see that it wasn't just my passport, it was ALL of my documents. Apparently, I forgot to tick one box. The box that asks if I need corrective lenses to read a number plate (license plate) from 20.5 metres away. I left that blank for two reasons. One, on the form, it says if you already have a license, don't bother to fill that out. Their own form says to leave it blank! Two, if they had bothered to look at my Canadian license, they would see that I do have that classification requiring corrective lenses. But noooooooooo, that might mean they would also see that I'm not limited to the classification of driving only an automatic!

What really gets on my nerves, is they ask you for your phone number and email in case there are any "problems" with your paperwork. If this was not a case for contacting me, I don't know what would be?!?!

I am so steaming about this. So bloody blinkered and useless to be unable to contact me to ask me. Instead send it all the way back to me so I can once again pay loads of money to send it to you registered mail and be even longer without the ability to drive safely insured. Twats. Twatty twatty twattery to top all twattery.

Election Day

Today is the general election in the United Kingdom. It's the first time EVER that I have been living in a country and allowed to vote in the election, which actually made it a bit exciting for me. In case you are wondering, all Commonwealth citizens residing in the UK are allowed to vote. So both colonials in this house have voted.

I had just moved to Germany when the first election happened in Canada in which I was old enough to vote (the previous one I was 17). Since then, I've not lived in Canada and therefore even the times I voted, it didn't seem to make much impact. Living in Germany as a foreigner, I was not allowed to vote, which really cheesed me off. Taxation without representation! They kindly allowed me to use the roads and public transport and all those other things my taxes went to, but it still felt unfair. So today is quite a remarkable day for me in exercising my part in the democratic process.

I won't tell you who I voted for because part of the great stuff in this democracy is that I don't have to tell you. I will tell you that I found it extremely odd that waving my polling card was enough to ID me at the polling station. What if I had dropped it on the way and someone found it and decided to use it? What if someone had stolen it? Sure, it's only one vote, but it's MY vote and only I should be allowed to use it. Why don't I have to prove who I am?

I was excited as I went out this morning to vote, but it was also coming from other people. There definitely a slight feeling of excitement around. I'm not sure anything will change around here, we are in a pretty solid Conservative seating (hee hee, I'm glad I checked that link and didn't just guess at it, since there is also a Teresa May), but the Liberal Democrats have been gaining momentum so it could be interesting results. And just so he doesn't feel left out, the Labour candidate link too. Whatever the result here and overall in the UK, I am very happy I have finally had the chance to exercise my vote. You may consider it a right, but speaking from experience and from knowledge of the many undemocratic places on the planet, it's most certainly also a privilege. Go out and use it.

Plots and Monopoly Spots Update

This is an update from an earlier post about allotments and Monopoly.

Getting an allotment was a great idea. I have really enjoyed going down there to potter about; weeding, watering and sowing seeds. G. didn't think much of the idea at the start of the time, seeing all the weeds that had to be removed. But since having had several delicious meals featuring homegrown produce, he has come around. Here's a photo montage of what has come out of my plot.

First, lots and lots of weeds came out.


These are the potatoes that came from the spuds we found in the ground from last year.

Me and just one of the many many bunches of Swiss chard we ate.

Pumpkins, bigger than my head!

Lamb steaks, with rocket, salad leaves, tomatoes and corn. Everything but the lamb was from the allotment.

Lena also enjoyed the corn.

There's actually a lot more I got out of the plot but I don't have photos. Lots of snow peas, regular peas and runner beans. Right now there's French beans growing, plus the salad, rocket, and 2 types of broccoli. I have to get some more stuff in to take up space over winter so that the weeds don't battle back. If you want to send me seeds to plant, send an email to zeebride@gmail.com and I'll pass along my address.

Knowing I want to keep up with the allotment, I went to pay for the next year at the parish office. She actually sent me away, saying to wait for my letter in the mail before paying. I don't see why it would be so complicated to take my money when I'm ready to pay it, but apparently it would mess up the system. Okay...

As for the Monopoly bit, the towns have been chosen and Cookham sadly wasn't one of them. This is probably a good thing for me, because it means I don't have to go out and buy a copy of the silly game. Monopoly is an okay game, but there are much better games out there. I'll save that rant for another day though.

Re-expatriation

We are gambling on Lena's passport arriving tomorrow. If it does, we are off to Munich on Friday for a few days to visit all our friends there and of course show off our lovely daughter. Keep your fingers crossed for us that the passport arrives!!

EDIT: Less than an hour after posting this, the passport arrived. Thanks for all your finger crossing, and if you are in Munich, hopefully see you this weekend.

Shots

Lena had her first set of shots yesterday. Well, I say set, but in actual fact it was only one. She got the 5-in-1 shot, which protects against Diphtheria, Tetanus, Pertussis, Polio and Hib (that's Haemophilus influenzae type B) but I decided to put off the one that protects against Pneumococcal variants. Why? Because next month, she gets a booster for the 5-in-1 and her first shot for Meningitis C. Then at 4 months, she gets boosters for both of these, and a booster for Pneumococcal. But when I read the information sheet for the Meningitis vaccine, it says directly on it the following: "Concomitant use of Menjugate Kit with pneumococal conjugate vaccines should only be consider if medically important and not on a routine basis". Translation: the meningitis C vaccine and pneumococcal vaccine shouldn't be given at the same time unless there's a good medical reason for it. Why? Because they haven't studied what might happen if they are given together like they have with the 5-in-1. Yet here in Britain it is standard procedure to give them both at the same time! I shake my head in wonder; does anyone read the packaging other than me? I'll arrange for her to get it in the next week or two, without any other shot with it.

I went last week and asked for a copy of the packaging so I could read up on the inoculations. When you get a pack of aspirin from the pharmacist, they tell you to read the packaging and follow the instructions carefully. But for giving your child a shot, you just go without any instructions into the nurse's room and let them stick stuff in them. What's ironic is that for the 5-in-1 vaccine, there is a leaflet for parents. It says on it in big letters "READ ALL OF THIS LEAFLET CAREFULLY BEFORE YOUR CHILD RECEIVES THIS VACCINE." When I went for the shot, the leaflet was nowhere to be seen. It certainly wasn't offered to me (and the nurse didn't know that I already had a copy). I bet 1 in 100 parents reads the thing before the shot is given. Talk about blind trust in the system.

I don't know if the all vaccines that kids get here is the same as what they get in other parts of the world; it's been too long since my own shots were given and there's probably a few different ones out there anyways. If you want to compare though, here is a concise list of what children are offered. I say offered, because all the inoculations are voluntary.

For the most part, I'm in favour of vaccination. But I'm also in favour of knowing what is going on. I don't think enough information is imparted to parents on this issue, I had to be very pro-active to get it.

Anyways, enough ranting. Lena was very brave yesterday. I could barely stand to watch - I'm fine getting needles myself but I didn't want to see her getting it. But she gave one little cry and then it was all over. No fever, no fussiness or any other side effect last night. I can only hope they all go so well.

Sightseeing in London

On Friday Lena and I headed into town to get a friend to sign for her passport. He works in "the City", which means right in the heart of London. It's where lots of banks and financial companies are located. You can't swing a cat without hitting someone in a suit. Since we were on a mission, it wasn't really sightseeing, but we did walk right past 30 St. Mary Axe. That's the official name of the Swiss Re building, but it's known affectionately as "The Gherkin" to Brits. A gherkin is a small pickle, something I didn't know for the longest time. Probably because I don't like them very much. But I do like the look of this big pickle building, it's quite sleek and cool. I tried to take a couple of shots of Lena in front of it, but it wasn't easy as she was in a carrier attached to me, so the angle was poor. None of them are very good pictures, but all together I think it's a funny little collage of our Friday trip. Note, Lena doesn't always look quite so grumpy and jowly. The angle I took it from, about 15cm from her face causes the extra-thick jawline. Her wondering what the heck that is in front of my face causes the frown of concentration.

To get a Canadian passport, I needed someone to sign as guarantor that Lena is who we say she is. It's a very short list of people who the Canadian government will accept as a guarantor. These are the requirements:

1. Have known you personally for at least two years.
2. Live within the jurisdiction of the passport issuing office and be accessible for verification.
3. Be one of the following:
   Dentist
   Judge
   Practising lawyer
   Magistrate
   Mayor
   Medical doctor
   Notary public
   Police officer
   Signing officer of a bank

Living within the jurisdiction means someone living in England. Considering we just moved here, how am I supposed to have known a mayor for 2 years? There are hoops you can jump through to get away without a guarantor signing for you (they involve a trip to the consulate and paying a substantial amount of money), but fortunately this wasn't necessary. A lovely fellow who I will call James, used to live in Munich and that's where I got to know him a couple of years back. He now works as a notary in London and was very obliging and willing in signing for Lena's passport. He even gave her paperwork his official notary seal, which should impress some bureaucrat along the line. That gets sent off tomorrow (along with her Canadian citizenship forms) and hopefully will get a passport back in 2-3 weeks.

Passports

I had a bit of bad news today. Not terribly bad, but a bit disappointing and unfortunate for Lena. She doesn't qualify as a British citizen. She was born in the UK, but since both G and I are here on limited rather than unlimited, resident permits, she doesn't qualify. If we get unlimited permits, then she could get UK citizenship. That however, will take 5 years for us to get. At which point, we ourselves could get British citizenship. Whether we stay here that long remains to be seen. It's just a bummer because it would have been great for her to have that easy access to the European Union for her future. She might still get it, who knows, but not right now.

So now we have to organise Canadian and Australian citizenship so that she can get a passport to travel. We would have done this anyways, but now we'll have to put it higher up the priority list than before. She'll probably get Canadian citizenship first, as she can apply for citizenship and her passport at the same time. For the Australian, first she has to have the citizenship and then she has to apply in person at the embassy. Okay, she doesn't have to apply in person, but G or I have to on her behalf. Least the Canadian one can be mailed in.

In England

My first post from the United Kingdom! The invasion is complete, the entire c'lonial force is now in the same country. So much happened in the last few days, I don't have time for a full update right now. I'm at the library and only have a short amount of time to use the computer - we don't have access from at home yet - so just a few short points to tell you about:

• I love our neighbourhood. This is already pretty clear to me. It's pretty rural, but it makes a great change from the busy street we used to live on with the heavy traffic noise.
• I still go to the wrong side of the car to get in, but am fairly okay with driving on the wrong/left side of the road. In fact, we were watching TV last night and I was confused as to why Tom Hanks was driving on the right in the movie.
• Still several things left to do in Germany, like officially deregister, but everything can be done from here via email or fax. I was so busy the last few days I'm really happy to have left, to be honest. I think homesickness will hit sooner or later though.
• Paperwork in the UK is just as bad, if not worse, than Germany.
• At a later point, I will have to write about how frustrating I find it to have switches on all the electrical outlets.
• Lots of boxes still to unpack, but G made a good start without me and we did some more on the weekend. Part of it is finding a good place to put things, not just unpacking them.
• Getting used to an English keyboard again is amusing to me. Lots of misplaced letter Zs instead of Ys and funkz punctuation.

Time's up on the computer here, so more another day. Hopefully a post about the last frantic 48 hours in Germany.

Last minute #1

I'm labelling this post last minute #1, as I think there might be another day with lots of last minute things to do. I'm going to keep it short, because of this.

Tomorrow the movers come. So today is the last chance to sort out junk that we don't want anymore from the stuff we do want to take. It's amazing how much stuff you can collect that you just never get around to throwing away. G. had an obsession of keeping the boxes that things originally came in. After throwing out about 20 boxes of various sizes and shapes and keeping 2 to repack in, I think he may be cured of the habit. Of course, I'm not much better, not tossing random bits of photo-copied teaching material, because "I might use this in another class". Well, it either should be filed or chucked, not left on a shelf for 18 months to collect dust.

The painters are coming in a few minutes to give us an estimate of how much it'll cost to repaint the apartment. The Hausverwaltung (the people who look after the building for the landlords) want our two pale yellow rooms painted white of course. I told them that I talked with my renter's association and they said that the yellow is okay because it's not a horrible shade, very decent. Well, the guy didn't agree, but I'll see what the painters say. He said on the phone it would take 2 coats to cover it. If it's 2 coats, I'll do it, but if it's more, too bad, they are getting yellow and we can fight about it. I also need to do all the final cancellation of stuff and faxing today while all the machines are around to use. We aren't taking the phone because the UK doesn't have ISDN, but some of the connecting cables and so on might go missing during the move. I learnt an interesting German saying on Tuesday: "Dreimal umgezogen ist wie einmal ausgebrannt," which means moving three times is the same as burning everything once. Very interesting and applicable in a few different ways. Both for throwing things away, the ensuing chaos, the loss and breakage of possessions, and maybe also the idea of having to start from scratch again.

Tonight is our farewell to the band we play in, The Pullacher Blasmusik. Yes, they are an oom-pah-pah band. I'm busy baking muffins for the occasion. I think that this is going to be the hardest goodbye for me. The band has been part of my life since my third month in Germany - basically I've known them longer than I've known anyone else in Munich, and I've had regular contact with them for 13 years, there's no one else I can say that about. Being in the band made me feel so much more a part of German society, it was proof to myself that I wasn't simply living in a little expat bubble community. Geez, I'm tearing up just writing this, I'm going to be a mess at band tonight.

I had my last OB-GYN appointment here in Germany on Tuesday. Everything is okay, she said I'm okay to fly still, thank god. I don't even want to picture having to take the train. So, if anyone from Cookham is reading the blog, I'm looking for a doctor, midwife and place to give birth, so any personal recommendations you can make will be appreciated!! It'll be only 6-7 weeks until my due date when I get over to England, so the situation is rather urgent. No, I don't have the exact date of when I'm flying out yet, probably mid to late next week. It all depends on how quickly I can organise the flat here.

Hmm, not as short a post as I planned, but lots happening to tell you all.